Genesis 31:6-7 - [Jacob said to his two wives, Rachel and Leah], "You know that I have served your father with all my strength, yet your father has cheated me and changed my wages ten times. But God did not permit him to harm me."
This devotion pairs with this weekend's Lutheran Hour sermon, which can be found at lhm.org.
Who are the difficult people in your life? How do you deal with them? Do you scream at them? Call a friend and vent? Leave the room and go for a walk? Write down all the reasons you have to be grateful for the other people in your life? All those could be helpful ways to cope—except for the screaming. That usually doesn't help. But the other stuff could. Alongside those more helpful methods, I want to recommend another. Listen to the book of Genesis—especially chapters 25 through 35, the account of Jacob, a guy who had a lot of difficult people in his life.
A most difficult person in Jacob's life was his father-in-law, who was also his uncle. Yeah, it's complicated. Jacob goes to live with his uncle after he split town because his brother wants to murder him. (And you thought you had it bad!) At his uncle's house, Jacob falls in love with Laban's youngest daughter, Rachel. Laban gives permission for them to marry, in exchange for seven years of indentured servitude from Jacob. On the night of their wedding, Laban rents the local VFW for the reception. And maybe the groom has a bit too much mead to drink. And the wedding tent is dark. And the bride's wearing a veil. Whatever happened, in the morning Jacob wakes up, looks over, and sees that it's not Rachel he's next to, but Leah, her older sister. The old goat tricked him! He gives Jacob some lame excuse about their custom not to marry off the younger daughter before the older, which would have been nice to know up front! Thanks a lot, Uncle Laban! Things go from bad to worse. Laban keeps tricking Jacob, changing his wages, cheating him. This goes on for 20 years.
If you've got a few difficult people in your life, you can relate to Jacob. Here are some insights on how to deal with them: first, it may be time to be done with this person. Just leave. Jacob did, eventually. But note that Jacob wanted to leave at the 14-year-mark. God had him stay another six. So, maybe there's a reason God has let that difficult person into your life? And if you can't be done with them, you just roll with it. Roll with the punches. That's what Jacob did for a time. Just keep quiet and roll with it.
But there's more, because Jacob sees how God is working around and sometimes through difficult people. Maybe God is using that person like a mirror for you? Laban was like a mirror for Jacob. All the deception—that's what Jacob had done to his brother, and why his brother wanted to kill him. Now Jacob knows how it feels. God also may be using the difficult person like a mallet to knock off your sharp edges. Now, we're not saying that excuses any sin, but only that evil cannot negate God's good purposes. Look at how God used the difficult people in Jesus' life for good purposes. God can use a difficult person to wear us down, to break our pride to pieces. Jacob became a different person after 20 years with Laban.
God is the Author of Jacob's life story, and yours. But also remember that your difficult person has a story God is writing for them, because God loves them, too. And you get to be a minor character in their story, like how God eventually used Jacob to strip Laban of his idols, to break Laban's pride and power, to bring him closer to God. Remember that you may be the difficult person in someone else's story (not an excuse to be a jerk). And the fact that they put up with you—well, that's something for which you ought to be grateful. Maybe you should write that down somewhere. Or, give them a call?
WE PRAY: Dear Father, not only have You forgiven all my sins in Jesus, You also bear with me patiently, each day. Help me to be patient with others, for Jesus' sake. Amen.
This Daily Devotion was written by Rev. Dr. Michael Zeigler, Speaker for The Lutheran Hour.
Reflection Questions:
1. Which difficult person has been at the top of your mind, lately? What makes them so difficult to deal with?
2. Who is a "safe person" you can talk about this with? How much should you share?
3. What do you want to say to God about this difficult person?
Today's Bible Readings: Micah 1-3 Acts 21:1-17
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